Regarding Posting Before or After the Lesson…

This is the most common complaint I get from those who disagree with this site.

“Would you please consider posting your answers AFTER the lesson is over?  Then others couldn’t copy or couldn’t read your commentary until afterwards like BSF suggests.”

Here’s the crux of the problem:

When is AFTER?

Despite BSF’s efforts to have everyone on the same lesson, this is not the case.  The main culprit is Spring Break and the second one is the start date.  Most start after Labor Day. Here in the US at least.

But did you all think of the rest of the world?  Odds are those who complain about this have not.

They start SOONER than we do because Labor Day is not a holiday for them.

And then we have some of my favorite people around here:  The Aussies, The New Zealanders and those in Singapore, Malaysia, and the rest of Asia.

They start AFTER us.  Way after us.  Right now, they are on about lesson 9.  Should I wait on them to post excluding you all?

So, to all those who suggest I hold my answers back:  should I work around YOUR schedule then?  When it’s convenient for YOU?  And forget EVERYONE ELSE?  I think we know what Jesus would say to that one.

One woman recently commented that I am forcing you to read my answers, comparing you to children who are forced to eat dessert before the main meal and hence you all were “spiritually unhealthy”.  Seriously?  As if you couldn’t say “NO” to dessert.

Again, personal responsibility.  You either read them before, after, or not at all.  It’s your choice.  And praise God for that choice called Free Will.  You are in charge.  Not me.  I put my answers out there.  And you are free to click on this BEFORE, AFTER, OR NEVER AT ALL in accordance with your beliefs, your values, your goals, etc.

Please don’t put this on me.  I am here to help.  And I do it my way.  I appreciate feedback, praises, and disagreements but I do take offense when things are said on my site that are just fallacious and in total disregard for the will (and frankly intelligence) of others.

And occasionally, I feel the need to respond-AGAIN-to such critics as I did in this case.  To set the record straight.  And to emphasize-AGAIN-the importance of choice.

When Did “Google” Become a Bad Word?

Yep, I did it.

I said I googled answers to BSF questions IN CLASS this week and I got a “Shush” from the teaching leader, shocked expressions from some, and laughs from the others (who use google too).

Just being honest when asked how I found all my references.

When I first began BSF, I’d ask myself when a challenge question came up, “How do these women know these references?  I would NEVER know where to find that in the Bible.”

That’s when I started googling.

Because how else am I going to learn where in the Bible to find a passage about love for instance if I DON’T google?

My Bible background was minimal at the time.  I didn’t know the books of the Bible or where anything was.  I vaguely knew the New Testament was about Jesus.  That’s about it.

Even now, I’ll know generally in what book to find something but I still have to google.

For instance, I needed to know where to find the passage “you make everything work for my good”.  So I googled that and came up with Romans 28:8–the exact passage I was seeking but had no idea (besides the New Testament) where to look.

It’s the quickest, easiest way to learn where passages are in the Bible.

And I learn!  I read other passages too that come up about a topic and WHAM!  I know God better!

I couldn’t ask for more than that.

And, yes, I had help.  From Google.  An idea that God planted in someone’s mind.  An idea we all can learn from.

Why Does BSF Attendance Drop During the Spring?

This question came up inadvertently when I made a comment in my conclusions about Lesson 22.  I mentioned how I thought one of reasons people drop out of BSF when Spring arrives was because of lessons like Lesson 22 where we are studying the same passage for 3 weeks.

Some of you chimed in so I thought it deserved an expanded forum.

So I’ll pose the question:  Why do you think BSF attendance drops in the Spring?

I’ll give you my thoughts:

1)  A year-long bible study is trying.  It tests our strength, our endurance, and our willingness to be challenged by God.  Some are just not up for the challenge or they need a break so they take one.

2)  Spring fever.  When the days are longer, we want to be outside, not inside.

3)  The lessons are dull and aren’t challenging–the opposite of number 1.  As exhibited in my opinion by Lesson 22 of Genesis.  People feel they are not growing so why bother?

4)  Life gets in the way.  It’s the reason why church attendance waxes and wanes in people’s lives.  Personal events happen be it a health crisis, death, employment issues, kid issues, or what have you that demand our attention more.

I know BSF has people who crunch these numbers and draw conclusions from them.  I’d love to have a report, wouldn’t you?  Would be interesting.

Why I Would NOT be in BSF without the Internet…

I liked Lesson 14 day 5 because it prompted me to learn more.  Admittedly, I spent two days looking up references and finding all these websites.  I read commentaries on the passage.  And I posted my answers before discussion for you all to read.  I did everything I have been told NOT to do before going to BSF class.

And GASP….I learned!

If I hadn’t of done this, this lesson wouldn’t have had the impact it did on me.

While I see where BSF is coming from in terms of letting the Bible and God speak to you, I think they are ignoring a crucial resource in the Internet (which they are changing but slowly).  Like 14a for example on Lesson 14.  Are most people supposed to know this? Are we supposed to know the boundaries of the Promised Land?

For me, I am visual.  I need to see the boundaries of the Promised Land on a map.  I loved the maps I found that overlap Israel today and the Promised Land, which clearly show Israel does not possess all God’s promised land.

And the study of fire.  I consider myself Bible illiterate in terms of where verses and Scripture are located in the Bible.  Every challenge question (which our leader insists are now “bonus” questions which causes me to cringe inside every time she says this.  If they are bonus questions, then write “bonus” on the questions) I google.  The first thing I do is google.  Because I have no idea where God is fire in the Bible.  None.  I have a vague notion about the burning bush and Mt. Sinai but where is this in the Bible?

Without the Internet, these lessons would be frustrating, time-consuming (more-so than they are already), and I’d be left with a feeling of ineptitude, one that I’m supposed to know where God is fire in the Bible but I don’t so therefore I’m a horrible Christian.

I’m in no way saying this is BSF’s fault I feel this way.  I’m just speaking personally.  How I’d feel if I couldn’t come up with the answer.

Yesterday I received yet ANOTHER comment on how I am “prideful”, “feeding my ego”, and how I am ruining BSF.

Fine.  You all are entitled to your opinions.

Yet tell me this:  why are SO many of you here then?

I think the aforementioned reason plays a BIG part.  We, as humans, are created to find answers.  To solve problems.  To better ourselves.  And if we show up to class without an “answer (be it right or wrong)” we feel bad (blame public schools or human nature).

And we don’t want to feel bad.  We want to feel good.  Good about ourselves.  Good about our answers.  Good that we learned something and aren’t wasting our time in Bible Study.

I want to know where God is fire in the Bible.  But I can’t discover that without help.  I just can’t.  I’m not a Bible scholar.  I don’t read the Bible like I should.  I NEED help.

In class, there is just not enough time to get the answers.  Especially on this one.  A tiny space for a HUGE answer.  And our leaders don’t spend the time necessary on such a huge question to satisfy my thirst at least.

Hence, you all come here.  I hope to learn and dive a little deeper than class and lecture and the notes can afford.  I hope to feel confident when you enter class.  I hope to feel like you’ve learned something from me or the many others who throw in their two cents on the questions.  I hope you have been prodded to discover more and research further than even the questions ask for.

This is why I do BSF.  For the “further” I am led.

Admittedly, I was upset by this person’s comments.  No one likes to be called names, especially anonymously.  It got me down.  For I take it personally.  That’s who I am. That’s why I quit being a columnist.  Couldn’t take the constant personal attacks.  And this is why I’m anonymous and plan to stay that way.  Otherwise, I think I’d quit if I were discovered.  Too sensitive to take the criticism.

Then I finished this LESSON.  And I was reminded of why I’m here.

So my question is:  Is it so WRONG to admit you need help?  You need help in understanding God and His word?  Is it so WRONG to seek out websites (mine included) that afford that help?

I stand by what I have always asserted when criticized about this site:  this is about GOD. It’s about knowing HIM.  It’s about growing your relationship with HIM.  And how you get there or what resources you use (in my opinion) does not matter to HIM.  I don’t think I will be judged by God for blogging my answers.  I don’t think He’s going to say I was a horrible person.  I don’t think He will say I shouldn’t have “googled” Bible passages.

I have done this since Day 1 of BSF when I first began and as long as I am in BSF I shall continue to do so.

For in my heart I know as I type these answers I am digging further into His word and into Him that I normally wouldn’t be.  As I strive to find every website for you all, I learn as well.  Even on the days I say “I didn’t like this lesson” or “I didn’t learn much” something was planted.  I just haven’t seen it yet (and I bluntly say so).

And I do the next day’s lesson faithfully for I know not every lesson is an “ah-ha” but the next moment is right around the corner!  And then I will see how these “lessons I didn’t learn” fit into the BIG picture.

So call me “prideful”, “egotistical”, “selfish”, and “the downfall of BSF” all you want.

For I don’t answer to you.  I answer to HIM.  PERIOD.

Is It a Sin to Marry a Non-Believer?

Our Bible Study Fellowship teaching leader flat out said this week, “It’s a sin to be married to a non-believer.”  I immediately blanched because I’ve never heard this before.

Being that we discussed marriage and the passages that believers use to assert this assumption last year in BSF’s study of Acts, I was indeed curious.  For this was never mentioned AT ALL.

All we talked about were Paul’s words in 1 Corinthians 7:12-16 and not once did anyone say it was a sin to marry or be married to a non-believer.  It was all about IF you were married to one, what do you do?

Resolved to find the answer, I researched.

Again, it all comes down to translation of the Hebrew and Greek words that the Bible was originally written in.

The main passage people use to assert this assumption is 2 Corinthians 6:14-18 “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers.  For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common?”

The key word is yoked.  But this is the NIV translation.  This word is translated differently in other translations.

I’m curious as to what you all think.

Personally, I don’t think it’s a sin.

Remember the definition of sin, which according to Webster’s Dictionary is “a transgression of the law of God”.  Transgression means a violation of a law or command; to go beyond the limits.

According to my bible dictionary (Zondervan Illustrated Bible Dictionary by Douglas and Tenney) sin is “revolt against the holiness and sovereign will of God.  It is a condition of the heart and the outworking of that condition through one’s words and actions.”

I believe nothing in this world happens without God’s plan.  I believe God puts husbands and wives together for a purpose.  And I think one of these purposes is so you can influence your spouse and even save them through living a Christian life and in turn they turn to Jesus.

We are called to “be imitators of God” (Ephesians 5:1) and I believe it is our example that leads others to Christ.

If you love an unbeliever enough to marry him or her, then God loves them enough for you to save them for Him.  It’s the same for family members.  It is our duty to bring them to God.  To show them God’s love that dwells in us–for them.

I believe it is God’s will.

Now should you go seeking a marriage with an unbeliever?  No.  Should you be wary before you say I do?  Yes.  Is it prudent to marry one?  No.

But it’s God’s will.  Not our own.

I find it hard that Paul who spoke so much about marriage wouldn’t come out and clearly say, “It is a sin to marry an unbeliever so don’t.”  Thus, I just don’t see this as a “law” put forth by God similar to the Ten Commandments.

Again, it’s all interpretation and translation.  And since none of us lived in the first century AD or asked Paul himself what he meant here, we can’t say for certain.

And we all know how languages change (see my spiel on the nature of languages HERE.)  Some words just don’t translate perfectly into other languages.  If you’ve ever studied another language or lived in a country with a different native tongue, you know what I mean.

Even within the same language.  England has many phrases that do not translate into American and vice versa.  Same with Spanish.  The Spanish in Spain is totally different from the Spanish of the Americas and even within the countries of the Americas.  Just ask Chileans and their “modismos”.

To me, love is stronger.  Don’t condemn others because they married an unbeliever.  Leave that to God.  But love them instead.

I do find it hard to believe this wasn’t talked about last year.  I looked up my post from last year when we studied 2 Corinthians and I even said in my conclusions I was disappointed BSF DID NOT talk about this.  View the post HERE

We did discuss 1 Corinthians 7 (HERE) and only talked about what to do if you are married to a non-believer.  And no where do I remember the word SIN entering the picture.

Once again, I’m disappointed in BSF.  They probably didn’t want to offend people by bringing up this very important debate (I think) in today’s society.  Because I bet a good majority of people are married to unbelievers.

I want to know.  Is it a sin?  Am I wrong to think it isn’t?  What’s the Scripture that speaks to this besides the ones above?

I attend BSF to get answers to questions I have.  This to me is important.  I need to know this since marriage affects most of the world’s population.  I need to know this for those around me.  For my kids who will one day marry.

Maybe I’m just too much of a “complainer” as some of you think.  Or I expect too much.  Or I question too much.  Or there is obviously something wrong with me….

I just want to be challenged that’s all.  So I can grow and be more like Jesus and change my thinking if needs be.

To me, this is challenging.

END NOTE:  One post I found that proposes it is a sin to marry a non-believer:

http://www.reasonablefaith.org/marrying-a-non-christian

Another article that says we should ask instead “Why would you want to marry a non-believer?” but the author also believes it to be a sin:

http://www.christianitytoday.com/biblestudies/bible-answers/marriage/unequallyyoked.html

What My Poll Revealed (And What I Already Knew)…

My last poll, asking how long it took you all to do your BSF lessons, was actually a suggestion from one of you on my blog.  The reader was saying it took her a fair amount of time and was curious if she wasn’t the only one.

It reveals that most of you do it all in one sitting with the majority of you doing the questions on a Sunday night or Monday before class.  I had a fair number of comments about this as well.

But I already knew this…

“How?” you may ask.

Because of the number of hits I get to my blog.

The most are ALWAYS on Mondays.  The second-highest are ALWAYS on Sundays. Always.

In the two years I’ve been doing this, this has been the case.

Now what does this say about man (might as well ask since we are studying the creation of man and his nature, right?).

Inherently, we don’t like to work.

Eden seemed like a great time to me.  The “work” seemed not so hard.  I imagine petting animals all day long and chit-chatting with God about the weather He’d send.

Until the Fall…

Then work became not so fun.

Same here.  The daily study questions or “homework” is just that–work.

I’ll admit it.

Some days I struggle.  Wondering what they are looking for…just like back in school.

Some days I spend a while searching for answers.

Other days are easy.

Just like school.

Now how many of us liked school?  High School?  Junior High?  Those days?

Not many of us.

So BSF homework reminds us (perhaps subliminally) of school.

Am I right here?

So we procrastinate.  Wait till the last minute…putting off the unpleasantness and “pain” of work.

It’s human nature.

You college crammers know what I’m talking about here.

So as we study the Bible and ourselves, we discover something:  human nature is here to stay.  The Bible is timeless because the people in the Bible could be you and me today. People act how they always have since the Fall.

Sometimes this is good.  And sometimes this is not so good.

In this simple example of BSF homework, I’ll let you make the call.

In my humble opinion, I believe God speaks to you whenever you open the Bible-whether 5 days before class or 5 minutes.  As long as you get it done and you learn and you grow it shouldn’t matter if you’re a procrastinator or not.

After all, it seems to me to be human nature….

WARNING: I May Be Sitting Next to You in Class….

I love technology.

Last week, my teaching leader pulled up the Bible on her cell phone.

My friend uses her IPad to find Bible passages.

All about it.

However, last week, someone in my group also used their phone–but not to pull up the Bible.

This woman pulled up my blog and read my answer VERBATIM.  From her phone!

Admittedly, she was called on because she hadn’t spoken and I, at least, discovered she hadn’t done the lesson.

But she pretended she had by reciting my answer.  Which was an answer that was personalized.

Normally, I don’t mind this.  But then I had to be quiet the rest of the time, afraid I’d give myself away.

Because, yes, I do use my answers in class.  After all, they are my answers.

Lately, I’ve been more wary though since I would bet half of the women in my group read my blog.  So, I try to only answer the obvious ones where we all have the same answer. You know the ones:  where the answer is the devil or Jesus Christ, etc.

Otherwise, I may give myself away–or you all may think I’m just cheating off of this site!

But I know for a fact this woman was!

I don’t mind if you use my answers.  I’d prefer you print it off ahead of time though.  Then I know you at least looked at the questions.

This woman hadn’t even read the question (or my answer) until that very moment.

So if you don’t want others (or me) to know you haven’t done the lesson, at least paraphrase my answer.  Pause and read it first and then put it in your own words.  Or write it in your own words.

With the popularity of this blog and the number of people who subscribe and read it daily, odds are there are several of you in your group.

And I love that!

I love how you all contribute to questions I have or others have and how we are all growing together in God.  It’s fabulous!  It’s why I do this!

And I am honored and blessed if you learn from me or even use my answers.  This is not an attempt to knock the woman who used my answers last week in class.

This is just an encouragement to do your lessons and see what God has for you.  You all read what God has (or recently doesn’t have) for me.  Discover His word in your life.

And from the changes BSF seem to be making, it’s okay if you come to class and admit you didn’t do it.  Someone else can share what they learned and you can learn from them. You won’t be looked down upon like in years past (at least from what I’m seeing in my group) and what I pray for.  We are all busy.  But you made it to class.  And you will learn. Just not as much as if you had done the lesson.

But we all have those days where the dog puked, the kids are sick, the car broke down, you moved, you spent an hour on the phone trying to resolve a bureaucratic nightmare, etc.  All those unforeseen events that take away time…

And God will meet you right where you are….

But remember….You never know who’s in your class…

There’s only one of me.  But there are thousands of you!

BSF Scriptures Now Online!

Hey all,

I received an email from a BSF discussion leader who posts the Scriptures on his site that correspond to the lessons in both English and Spanish using Bible Gateway which uses the NIV version.

Just another tool in order to facilitate your lessons!  Great if you forgot your Bible or are in a rush!

Check it out and thanks for doing this!  I’m sure you are helping many!

http://www.bsfonline.org

Ruminations from a Selfish Blogger…

All summer I have had the policy of NOT commenting too much to others’ comments. Not that I don’t read them (I read all of them) or that I didn’t care (I care what everyone writes).  But that I didn’t need to defend myself to others.

Well…

I have received some comments and emails lately (as I do every year BSF begins) from those wondering why I’m posting my answers, why I’m ruining BSF, and how I’m a horrible person.

I delete these and don’t respond.

Well, then I had the “audacity” (as one woman put it) to air a grievance against BSF for their desire to video-tape my children.  I was told I should have handled this privately and I shouldn’t be complaining about BSF for it might turn potential future BSF’ers off to BSF.

I was even told my posts are number one in Google (yes, I know this.  I have known this for quite some time.  But it’s not something I flaunt and I even try NOT to acknowledge how successful this blog is so I never talk about it for this blog is NOT about that).

Hence, because of this, I should have some “responsibility” in what I say.

Yes, and don’t we all?

But last time I checked I lived in the United States of America with a Constitution that grants me the right to free speech.  And bursting someone’s bubble when I discuss an imperfection of BSF is something I should not do.

It’s like telling me I sin every day.  Yep.  Guilty.

Most of these emails/comments are from those new around here.  They missed the whole debate about how horrible a person I was about posting my answers, how I have debated long and hard about even doing this because so many of you didn’t like your paradigm changed of what BSF is, was, and will always be.  (And, yes, if you google this you will find these posts still on my blog).

They also missed my many blog posts of suggestions to BSF for improvements such as an online forum, an online class, notes online for members’ only, etc.  Not all of my BSF postings are “negative.”

Here’s a bulletin:  BSF is not perfect.  As am I.  I am a human being, fallen since Adam, and I sin.

BSF is made up of human beings who sin as well.

I have a legitimate concern regarding signing away my right to have my kids videotaped and I discussed it here, on this forum, with you all.

You can read it.  You can not.  That’s your choice/God-granted Free Will.

This blog remains a place for me to be me without condemnation or judgment if I discussed this matter “privately”.  For then all would know who I am.  Something I guard fiercely in terms of where I live and who I am.

I want to be me without feeling judged because I dared to not sign a form.  Is that so wrong in this world?

And, yes, Christians judge.  Sometimes more than others.  It has to do with the higher standard God holds us to…but I won’t go into that.

Suffice it to say I’ve taken my fair share of knocks for what I do around here.  I am not perfect.  And just because I blog my answers and am a Christian doesn’t mean I should be held to a higher standard than you all.  We are all equal in God’s eyes.

Sometimes I feel you all are “shocked” by what I say around here because you have an image of me being a perfect Christian lady.

And that is something I am far from.

But you have a choice:  to be here or not to be here.

I don’t force you to sign up to my blog.  I don’t force you to google and find my answers.  I don’t force you to read. (And please don’t tell me you aren’t ever coming back again.  As if that affects me….how?).

I merely exist here and if I am the only one here I will still be happy.

Granted, I’d like to help others (otherwise, I wouldn’t be serving God).  But I don’t need anyone’s approval for what I say or do but God’s.

And that includes you all.

I would like this to be a place of learning, of community, of sharing, of being.  A place God brings us.  For whatever reason.  I would like it to be positive (but it’s not always going to be).  I would like it to be a meeting of friends.  To talk and discuss Him who most matters in our lives.

And occasionally for me this is a place I air my frustrations with this Fallen life.  A place I bear my soul, my heartache, and my pain when my dog dies (I miss her presence every day); how grieved I am when God moves me across the country; or how I don’t understand this world I live in.

And since BSF is a big part of my life and this blog, I air my qualms about the organization as well as my praises.

But I am in no way responsible for how you respond to it or who chooses to read this or who gets turned on or off to BSF.  For that is God’s realm.

You will hear me say many times on this blog that I am selfish.  I am.  Something I strive every day to overcome.

When it comes to this blog, I am selfish.  It’s mine.  A place for me.  Even my family doesn’t know the url like some of you do

And if I say something you don’t like or agree with feel free to correct or comment on it. But know also I’m not going to change what I do around here.  And yes your comments may be edited or deleted if it is offensive.  To me.  (Selfishly).

Like I was selfish in wanting my dog to live.  For me.

Finally, I want so say thank you.  For all of your encouraging words during my trials, my heartaches, my “complaints” and “grievances” and for your support.  If it wasn’t for you, I’d probably quit this blog (something I debate virtually every week).  Because some days it’s just not worth it.

But then one of you says how grateful you are I am here (and yes I read these even if I don’t respond back) and I smile.

So I trudge along.  Putting in the extra time.  For you.

And occasionally for me when it pertains to my little life on this side of heaven.

So thank you all.  I pray you find a little bit of what you are seeking here.  Even if it’s only an answer that may or may not be right or wrong.  But it’s a thought.

And sometimes all you need is a thought…

Am I Wrong NOT to Sign the “Video/Photographic Image Release Form” by BSF?

I have been and always will be hesitant to sign any form thrust in my face.  The BSF form I received that lets them film my children is one of these.

This form (for those of you without children in the program) grants BSF the right to film my children for use in training.  Here, I have no problems.

I do have a problem with them wanting to use these images for whatever purposes they like:  use on the Internet and in print material without my knowledge.

Here’s where I draw the line.

At BSF, I was made to feel like I have to sign this form.  I was asked repeatedly about it and I just kept dodging.  In the end, I haven’t signed it (and won’t).  This behavior I didn’t appreciate.  No one ever said you didn’t have to sign it.  But we all know you don’t have to sign anything.

There is a stipulation that my children will have to leave the classroom when they are filming if I don’t sign it.

This I don’t particularly like.  Mainly because it makes my kids feel weird.

But I’ve done this in public school too.  Not given my permission for a dopey video, etc, and my kids had to sit by themselves.

As you can tell, I am uncompromising in these things.

As most of you know, I am not on Facebook and have no intentions of ever being on Facebook.  This website is devoid of pictures of my kids.  I just don’t like the idea of anyone knowing what they look like.  I am way too paranoid when it comes to child predators, kidnappers, and bad people in general.  This world is too dangerous these days in my view.  When my kids are old enough, then they can put their picture on the Internet if they choose.  But I won’t.  Any account can be broken into and before you know it your kids’ pictures are everywhere.

This applies to BSF as well.  As good intentioned as this is, all it takes is one hacker.  Slim chance, I know.  But so are the chances of all the bad things in life.  Of which I guard against to the best of my ability.

Yes, I am paranoid.  I will be the first to admit.  But that’s one “label” I embrace.

Of course, this is my opinion.  Every parent must decide for themselves.  But gone are my days when I sign anything without careful consideration.  Especially when it has to do with my children.